Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Squidgasm

I've been a little hesitant to post my feelings on the depressing news of no more Higurashi: When They Cry or Familar of Zero licenses for Funimation but a recent bit of news has me a bit happier.

Now, I don't want to alarm anyone but a cephalopod invasion force, said to be headed by a powerful squid, is soon to be upon us! Militaries worldwide are preparing for the terrible war that is to come while some are already turning into quislings to welcome our new squid overlords. Truly it is a dark day when any man chooses to abandon his fellow humans in favor of joining forces with the creatures of the deep blue sea.

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John Sirabella has informed us of the coming war and confirmed that the enemy has learned several languages, including Japanese and English! They will arrive with plenty of extra support as well, so we must be on our guard and ready to prevent this dangerous force from taking over the land!

We do have photo intelligence on the enemy's leader and there are some sketchy reports of an ability to vomit ink. One agent reports that the enemy has tentacle hair!

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We lost contact with that agent shortly thereafter but we do not fear the worst as the agent was male. We've never lost a man to a tentacle yet!

Unfortunately, gender equality laws forced us to place women on the front lines of the last skirmish with the tentacles, resulting in unspeakable casualties. Fortunately, our early intelligence does not suggest that the squid's tentacles are naughty.

The first battle will begin on September 27 according to our intelligence. The Squid Girl, as she is known, will personally lead the attack on we dry-landers! All hope is not lost however as we've heard rumors that she may have a weakness!

We must all join together and take part in this battle against the Squid Girl! You can pre-order intelligence reports regarding the effort to battle the cephalopod armies here. Or you could attempt to gain favor with your new squid overlord by buying an idol to worship.

Together, we must stop the Squid Girl!

Although, her arrival will be another victory for English dub fans.

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Look for despair next time as I discuss why there's not much to nipa about. Future blog entries shall be reviews and perhaps a video.

Bye-ni!

8 comments:

  1. Considering that every single Media Blasters release this year (aside from a re-release of Otoku) contains an English Dub, they've definitely been on my good side as of late! Especially with great license pickups like this! :D

    Your post was very amusingly written, and I'm definitely more psyched up for Squid Girl than ever!

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  2. This was a fun post Richard J. You have gotten me enough interested in this title to pre-order it.

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  3. I want me some naughty tentacles :) and lolol Richard! That costume... xD

    @bal MB is indeed kicking butt this year! I hope they reveal some info to me at AX. Squid Girl will definitely be added to the collection and my bro is pumped for "squid girl tentacle hair action".

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  4. I vote Sandy Fox as the voice actress for Squid Girl for the dub.

    BTW, can you think up of alternatives for Sandy Fox for Squid Girl?

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  5. @ ALL: Thanks for the compliments and glad you liked the article!

    @ darkpaladinx: Depending on the studio and who does the direction, I can think of several VAs who might be good. Veronica Tailor can do cute very well though not as pure sugar as Sandy. Rebecca Forstadt could do a good job if they want cute with a bit of snark. (Hilary Haag would also be good that kind of work but this dub isn't likely to be going to Texas.) I also think Sherry Lynn would work if they want her to sound more like a kid.

    In terms of my personal preferences, I'm pretty open-minded. I think the translation issues will be more of a deal breaker. Most fans seem to like the idea of squid-based puns in the English version while there are other, likely less appealing, options.

    By the by, if anyone is having the problem where you can't comment, try unclicking the Keep Me Signed In option.

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  6. I'll being buying it when it comes out. At least it will be dubbed, which is a good thing. As long as the dub is good, I'll be happy. (Wilhemina-Anime)

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  7. lol... I somehow missed these fools... Maybe I'll see them at AX since at the end it says they are going.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sw40kcd5rP4

    WARNING!!!
    It's really damn gay lmao. Skip the starting parts where they use the oil oh god... The ending stuff is hilarious all the way to the credits.

    around @5:30 it's good lol

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